LIFE STORY, without you.

Friday, July 20, 2007

I watched the above movie, starring Will Smith. It's an excellent movie which taught me many lessons. For those whu havent catch it yet, u shd..Talking abt movies, my list of ' I want to watch...' juz keeps getting longer n longer. For now the spaces shall be filled with Transformers, Harry potter, The ex (sam's recommendation) n Sivaji..i repeat this is only for now.

I've got weird ppl whum i dun knw at all, msging me. I've also got a primary sch lost contact FOUND. I don't know...I'm losing my patience with my phone. Sooner or later it's going to be thrown down the 10 storeys if it's not goin to buck up its performance.

I'm losing my momentum in my pursuit of life. Just havent got any mood to do anything. I hope this is only momentary. Lots of things are due, my revision, wrtoral project, portfolio..etc

I think my tuition really hates me. She's neva going to forget me as a tutor lol. But i don't care, because if she has to learn things thru the hard way then so be it. I'm sure one day down the road she'll realise things. Hopefully it's not too late then.

On the brighter side, i'm going out with my lil gang tmr. Yay!

Oh ya, i learnt how 2 use a stethoscope today. It was cool. We also learnt how to measure blood pressure. It's more meaningful to learn something that's related to urself as compared to so many other things.

-our love story ;

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Time is passing by so slowly. I'm waiting for this 3 yrs to wheez past quickly..not tht i hate it or anything but juz wn 2 get over this phase quickly.

i got no idea wth is happening during DFund lessons. I hope to seek enlightment in Friday's remedial lesson. I'm sure the other lecturer will do a gd job..better than *ahem*.Dfund lect was so boring to the extent wher emmz, sam n i were talking abt our ex guys, sex, abortion, fanny's pregnancy, while my dear jen was trying to understand some latch/flip flop things and she succeeded!!!So proud of u jen..

Is it me or anything else bcz i feel like the ground is moving ( the earthquaky feeling )...i know it's juz me...

-our love story ;

Monday, July 16, 2007

Arh i have been rarely stuck in a situation where i'm like the only non chinese speaking person in the grp. This time i'm the only indian in my class and i dun dnw mandarin. Sad case. I feel totally lost and helpless when my friends are speaking chinese n i dun understand anything tht's happening. Ah tht's when i choose to retreat in2 my own cyberspace...( this is y i'm quiet all of a sudden guys). I wish i din skip my mt lessons on Fridays when i was in kindergarten. I think it would have been really helpful if they had offered Mandarin as one of the CDS modules instead.

And guess wht i juz found out tht tp is opening up a new diploma course...dip in psychological studies....WTH...

Ther's an eff comm test tmr ...the presentation ends at slide 88..and i'm onli at slide 15 now.long way to go...haha

-our love story ;

Saturday, July 14, 2007

It's been really a LONG..time since i last saw a tamil ass book..n today i went to tekka to purchase 2 of them for my tuition student. I felt like the gravitational strength of the earth was greater thn ever before today. This happens whenever i'm having my stomach cramps and i just need to sit down somewhere. And it is during times like this tht the bus moves like a tortoise and it takes half an hour for the bus to arrive...damn...hate this stage of womanhood

-our love story ;

Friday, July 13, 2007

I really wish she hadn't told me abt how the other friend does things for her house when she gets her pay. It makes me feel guilty and lousy. Because i havent done much. But tht's because it's not tht i dun want to, it's juz tht i dun haf the time and resources to do such things. My spendings are limited and closely under surveilance every now & then. So how do u measure friendship..is it based on how much things tht party has done for u n ur family to the extent tht even ur grandmother acknowledges tht. If u do, then i think i've failed as ur friend. The conversation we juz had leaves me feeling guilty and my conscience is killing me. I've tried my best to be there for you wheneva u needed me tht's the best thing i can do. I've also consoled u a dozen of times wheneva tht party has hurt u so deeply tht no redemption can be done. Whateva it is life has to go rite no matter wht...Good luck for ur exams anyway..

Btw 12/07/07, was one of those @#$^**&^ days in sch ever since sch begun. Juz when we thought everything was over it wasn't. We were busy since last week trying to put together our wrtoral project. Fen nee and i were done on wed, we gave our project for binding as it was due for submission the following day. Thursday came along and it was time for *&^%$%$ subject. It started off pretty well because tutor was quite entertaining making a mockery out of ppl whu had weird habits when tey present. Towards the end of the 2hr session he wanted to edit our projects. YUP EDIT IT meaning he had to correct our freaking formats which he din give us a proper one to follow anyway. And we had to correct it on tht day itself!!! so tht means we had to remove the binder, find for a stupid computer and adjust whateva shit format print it again and rebind it again n submit it to him. He was so particular abt damn thing as he even had the ***** to take out his ruler and measure the margin distance wth..Why are we blessed with such a teacher? i really duno...This project is worth 50%..and ther's another one which has started and tht is worth 40%. That's going to be a difficult task to handle for me because that's an ORAL presentation. I can't present in front of people..the ppl in this case will be my classmates. To add on to tht, we r going to do it in a lecture theatre without a mike..nw how fun cn tht get haha. On the other hand i juz want to give out my best and get over done with it ASAP.

Some words juz sound too familiar...blood clot, internal bleeding, accident, breathing, blood, give up, lungs, kidney. Evervtime i hear these words i think abt wht had happened and i shudder. I can't accept it yet. It will take time. If i'm already feeling like this i can't imagine how the ppl close to him will feel. I'll jus have to take it tht he's gone to a better place and he'll be fine.

If tht loss wasn't enough to cope with for the year. i Juz heard tdae tht my fellow senior course mate passed away today suddenly as his conditions got worse. I guess tht was a tough battle. I wasn't close to him but i know him. So all i can say is tht..'hope his soul is resting peacufully and he'll be missed by all who know him in one way or another'. All good things come to an end one day and i guess this it. IT's life and we have to accept it.

AP has been missing in action. I wonder wht's he been up tp lately. it feels weird when the person whu talks to u everyday suddenly doesn't or doesn't return u a call. It can get worrying if the matter persists and u dun knw the root cause of it. I really hope i'm jus imagining things.

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-our love story ;

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

I fucking hell wish she can fucking hell get out of my life. I am angry, frustrated, irritated and pissed off with living in this kind of home environment all ma life. I need to get out of my hse. I know i'm a coward i juz cant face this anymore. I need to get out of this house asap. I wish i was married off and left the hse long time ago never to return back even if she dies off.

This only happens in my hse my damn hell house. I cant do anything i want and i feel like i'm living in a prison. My life is so controlled even far more worse as compared to the prisoners. I need space. The person whum i'm supposed to look up to hasnt been doing her job well. Sad to say i've lost ma respect towards the moment i entered secondary school. That's when things started change. All my friends disagree with me bcz wht they see is juz a facade. Only i know wht's the real pic. i really wish i had a mp3 player so tht i can shut myself off from this world.

I hate life. Life is full of shit for me. Juz when things seem to be getting one thing or another fails. I tell myself i cant go overseas to study bcz i cant survive independently on a world filled with strangers. But looks like to get away from this hell i juz need to that. If only i could fast forward time, tht wld really help esp at this point of juncture.

god pls help

-our love story ;